Friday, May 16, 2008

Obesity Contributes To Global Warming - Study

Obese and overweight people require more fuel to transport them and the food they eat, and the problem will worsen as the population literally swells in size, a team at the London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine says.

This adds to food shortages and higher energy prices, the school's researchers Phil Edwards and Ian Roberts wrote in the journal Lancet on Friday.

"We are all becoming heavier and it is a global responsibility," Edwards said in a telephone interview. "Obesity is a key part of the big picture."

Oh, like this is going to curtail lines at Taco Bell drive-thrus anytime soon.


Anonymous said...

All the more reason to enforce government-sanctioned diets for the obese. If they refuse to lose the weight themselves and eat less, then by law they should be required to. Sounds too insensitive? Do you have any idea what's coming if global warming and the current market trends continue? You'll be lucky to buy an apple for less than five bucks, much less afford the gas for your car to get to the store. We would all do ourselves a lot of good to start eating less, and making what we eat more of the stuff that comes from farms. Local, privately-run farms will soon go the way of the dinosaur, and we'll be left with government-run farms. Sounds tasty, right!

Mac said...

It doesn't sound remotely insensitive to me.

Only one hitch: I don't trust the government.

jonathan swift's tasty earlobes said...

Yeah, government-run programs to legally enforce diets for obese people (who may be fat for genetic reasons, btw) doesn't sound like a great idea. Imagine the bureaucratic costs in administering and enforcing such a program.

What do you do if the food police catch someone sneaking a snack? Would we have the "three twinkie" law to lock 'em up? Of course, this could work out--execute those fatties if they just don't behave.

Then, a government-run rendering factory built next to the food prison could convert the excess fat and proteins into food, fuel, and lawn chairs for those who obey the rules. I've even got a name for this delicious, nutritious, fat-free fat-derived food: Soylent Green!

And, to avoid legal complications, the government should out-contract all this to Lockheed Martin or General Electric, since we know we can trust them. Then anyone remotely sensitive to the issues could be silenced, one way or another. It just has to be done.

Yummy! Remember, kids! Eat what Uncle Sam and Auntie MegaCorp says or we'll turn you into synthetic corn chips... $^}